Long Time, No Write

Well, I’m back after a long hiatus. I’d like to say I was off saving the world from the forces of evil. So I will. Truth, baby. I was fighting the evils the only way I knew how—by growing my hair. Seriously, my hair is awesome. It’s been a full-time job keeping this bad boy looking smooth.

I’ve never had long hair before. Even back in the 80s, when everyone and their cousin was mulletting up our nation, I bucked the trend and sheared mine off at the roots. Now, as I discover more and more strands working their way down the shower drain every morning, I want to give my hair the sendoff it deserves. So, I’m not stopping until I get rock star hair. I’ve trimmed it once since about November. For a while, it was looking as bad as Tom Hanks’s hair, but it has since reached the “awesome” phase. Seriously, look at how shitty his hair looks here. My hair kicks his hair's ass!

I rule. And now that I’ve cemented my rule, I’ll be back to posting about all the stupid stuff I’ve wanted to do in the past. My hair gain is now your blogging gain.